Saturday, June 28, 2008
Ramblings
Dear Children, once again, welcome to the Master Theatre of Boredom. Again, my inspirations for a great amount of writing is no longer as the moments have passed. However, to bore you to the depths of your gray matter, I think I will be able to do so. Allow me to show you these skills of mine.
When I am alone, I think a lot. I used to be alone a lot, not because I do not have friends, on the contrary, I have a lot of friends. Well, I do not want to use the word acquaintance because it is seemingly unfair to those who deem themselves as my friends. So anyway, people come and go, a fact that I have recently come to terms with and I have one person to thank for. This person truly made me see that people come into your life and no matter how close they are, it does not mean they do not leave. Quite frankly, they are not obligated to stay in any case.
Even in my late twenties, I am still taking my time to grow up. I have to give myself a pat on the head; I am really growing up bit by bit, no matter how painstakingly slow it seems. Many of you have heard me say, "when I grow up, I want to be a ballerina." Well, what I truly want to say is, "when I grow up, I want to be a kid." My fantasy place is Neverland and soaring with the lost boys. Might have to get on Tinklebell's good side, fight Captain Hook and stay clear of the tick-tock croc.
Girls phear phats; I welcome it. I will tell you what phats has given me: knowledge, wisdom, strength, compassion, humility and natural botox. I am not a perfect person; I do not even come close. However, like I always tell myself, I have tried. Not good enough even by my standards, I tell myself, there is always tomorrow. Tomorrow might never come, you say? I might regret not doing it now, you say? Sure you are right but hey, I am lazy so I am always putting things off. Someone said I speak empty words. Truth is always hardest to listen to but I will face it and do something about it. Often actions that follow will be the best evidence. To that someone, I just want you to know that I am trying my better now, I will try my best eventually.
So let us discuss about my escape portals: animation, drama series, films and music. They bring out all the tears and love in me. Of course, I am not talking about every one of it, just the ones that do. I view tears as a sign of weakness that is why I only cry when I watch animation, drama series, films and music. That way no one will know. All right, if you are reading this then you know. Oh come on now, don't you go all soft on me. I do not need your empathy, consolation or whatever you think I may need by letting you on my weakness. After I dispose of my tears, I am renewed. I can be strong for anyone who needs me to be.
I am your Mary Poppins. I am your Nanny McPhee. I am supposed to be the person who will be there when you need. So let me fulfill my role. Humans tend to forget the big picture of life. Well, sometimes they choose to pursue what they desire and forget it. To those who have forgotten, I sincerely hope they remember it someday, somehow then world peace will follow. I told someone of my white container. That is my ivory tower and it even floats in space. I guess I am more of a loner than I let on. How interesting a person I am. All right, should not be so peacock-like.
So why am I telling you all these? It is simply because I have nothing better to say and while listening to a few songs from animation and Jay has brought out some passions in me. If you do not know the meaning of passions, please find out or ask me. Do not assume because according to my dad and everyone else who knows, if you assume, you "ass-u-&-me". A good film to catch is "The Fountain". Well, there are other amazing films but I will tell them to you when the time is right. Right now, "The Fountain" fits the mood I am in. Jay's "蒲公英的约定", "青花瓷" and "最长的电影" are wrapping their beautiful melodies and lyrics around me. When I close my eyes and listen, a (bitter)sweet smile will appear on my face. Try it with these songs or songs that allows you to indulge in a moment of tranquility.
All right, too much is too much, I know it too. I shall let your eyes and brains take a break from this monotony. I will see you people soon, I hope. Meanwhile, here is a quote I currently have an interest in.
"Rain is from the sky and tears are from the eyes. That has been decided a long time ago."
Ciao, pimples.
posted by Yang @ 4:27 PM
